Humane !

Feeling trapped in this body
finding myself terribly alone
people around me,
who are supposed to be mine
I don’t understand them,
despite sharing a common language
conversations based on prejudice and judgement
bizarre and humiliating it is
to divide humans on the lines of
religion, race, sex and skin colour.
These rituals, maddening remarks and
keeping cultural scores,
suffocating it is to be a witness
to this obsession of being superior
They say it is humane, it ain’t no wrong
and I feel absurdly and insanely lonely
so I resign from being too human.

-THEMOONLIGHTREVERIE

Photo by Tom Barrett on Unsplash

 

Wishes !

And lately,
I just have been wishing
whatever you’ve been wishing for
comes true !

-THEMOONLIGHTREVERIE

An open letter to Indian parents (A daughters perspective)

Dear parents
I know that you care about your children especially your daughter very deeply. I know that I will always be indebted for the things you’ve done for me, the love you’ve lavished on me and the care you’ve given me. I know probably I’m the most prized possession for you on this entire planet.

I know, your biggest concern visibly since I turned 18 has been my marriage. And things started to change from then. Since the day I started college, your interests in my grades and scores, my job prospects, my ambition gradually started to wane and suddenly, just in blink of an eye switched to my marriage. It took me some time to realize that how you stopped bugging me if I performed poorly on a test and how a thing which mattered to you so much when I was back in school, suddenly was just another mundane routine issue. I wish things could go back to the days when I was asked to study, when contrary to today my education was the most important thing that mattered to you. I don’t know what changed and when it did?

And then, when the college was over, and I confided in you about falling in love and wanting to marry the man of my likes when the time comes. All hell broke loose. You didn’t want to listen to any reason or logic I had to offer, simply because in a secular country like ours the only thing that matters when it comes to marriage is religion and caste. I cried, I begged, I shouted, I did every possible thing I could as your daughter for getting that chance to have you listen to me and understand the plethora of emotions in me. But you simply refused. So I did what I could do, kept quiet, staying patient in hope that one day you will understand.

I always kept my ambition and my love for him separate. Even when I fell in love with him, I knew I will not marry until I become financially stable. Did you not teach my brother to become responsible and financially stable before even thinking about marriage? Then why the education suddenly became different for me? How come just because my age and now my confession the only solution you could find for me was getting me married to the next guy you could find for me? Wasn’t it you Ma, who woke up with me at nights when I studied during the board exams? Wasn’t it you Pa, who used to tell me I’m no less than a guy and my daughter will become an administrative officer? Then how? how every thing just went away and why? Was it just a statement you used to please me?

Years have passed and I feel the strong foundation of values you gave me are now something you want me to change because I have grown up, and now marriage and marrying within the bounds of your society is the only thing I am supposed to do. And if I don’t I will somehow dishonor you. I know I have crossed the “marriageable age” according to you, and the one man I love is not appropriate for your societal satisfaction, so I now have to make a choice. But my question is why is it have to be me to make that kind of a choice, when you always told me that my happiness is the only thing that mattered to you? Do you not see where my happiness lies?

I am sorry to both of you. It is not my intention to hurt you,to cause you pain or embarrassment. But I am an adult now and my life is my own. I take full responsibility of my decisions, marital or otherwise. I wish I could go back in time and show you how you used to protect me if someone used to say something wrong to me and now I feel lonely because you feel everyone do have a right to say anything to me just because I probably am the one who needs to understand.

I will remain your daughter, I will still love myself, and more than anything else, I will always love you. I do hope, I rise to the morning one day when you are proud of the daughter you’ve raised, cherish and respect her choices, her life and most importantly her dreams.

Always your daughter.

-themoonlightreverie

The malign silence !

The despair within me
now has gotten silent
Be okay on the outside
as okay I can be
no physical signs yet
to show, of the bereft.
It lurks around every corner
gradually seeping,
creeping after me in
body and mind alike.
I speak no more of the pain
it ain’t pinch anymore.
The malignity of silence
grows in me, like
the silence waits to meet silence

-THEMOONLIGHTREVERIE

Fulcrum !

Don’t you fret, for I’m here
And I’ll always be here,
to let you know, that you’re loved
showing how my world revolves around
the fulcrum, that you are

Yes, I will be here
for you to know, that
no matter the burden
big or small,
you’ll always find me right beside you
walking together, even when the path is
brutal, and life throws vexed questions.

and when the nights get longer
and the darkness surrounds you,
when the sleep, deceives you
rendering restlessness and anxiety
i’ll be right there to hold you
to sing you to sleep
and comfort you, with my embrace
telling you how, we will get through it

For the pain and agony
just like the smile and laughter
remember we are shared partners
through the thick and through the thin
and in sickness and in health,
for my weary mind, never leaves your side
even when distance puts us aside

you don’t have to be alone,
cause I’d always stretch my hand
for you to hold it, for there is nothing
in the world that will change the fact
that for you,
i’ll travel every hard and aching mile, and
the fire of love isn’t ever gonna burn and fade

So just leave your pain and worry aside
hold me tight,
cause I’m never gonna leave your side
holding you till the sun shine brights
from near, or from far I’ll be there
to look for the thoughts in which you are.

 

-THEMOONLIGHTREVERIE

Photo by Tom The Photographer on Unsplash

Deception !

She was quiet

because her heart was breaking

and she knew,

soon her body will give up on her too

and then all that’ll be left;

a lifeless body,

in once a lively soul.

But she was quiet,

cause she knew no-one is going to believe her

as she perfected the art of deception

now killing her slowly,

one pretence at a time !

-THEMOONLIGHTREVERIE

Photo by Caleb George on Unsplash

Bittersweet !

Each one of us, who is human

live with loneliness

at some times and others

inescapable it is, yet measurable.

destroying selves with failed attempts escaping it

is just no good,

for a vicious cycle it is,

the more we try, the more deep it gets.

rather,

accepting it, making it your own

savouring it, spending time with it

making it less lonely with your company

so, its bittersweet when it leaves !

-THEMOONLIGHTREVERIE

Photo by Daria Tumanova on Unsplash

 

 

A monologue !

 

When the darkness envelopes the sky,

and the quiet surrounds the night,

her empty eyes look down into the abyss,

trying to start a conversation,

rather it converts into a monologue,

where the abyss just stares right back at her,

through her eyes to her bruised soul,

uttering not a word, just giving a blank stare,

as if taunting her,

where she keeps on questioning,

Will this ever end?

The pain of not seeing him,

Will this ever end?

The suffering, the agony of this distance,

Will this ever end?

The loneliness, the numbness,

leaving her asphyxiated.

Will this ever end?

she keeps on beseeching,

in hope of some relief,

yet, the blank stare of the abyss,

 all she is graced with instead.

 

-THEMOONLIGHTREVERIE

Photo by Riccardo Mion on Unsplash

Irony !

 

Blank and empty,

One, an emotion;

Other, a state of mind;

complimenting each other,

intricately enough,

making a poetry,

filled with melancholy,

making the heart,

ironically enough,

seek comfort

in the void,

which once needed,

a touch of affection,

and a tint of love,

for letting the heart

feel tranquillity.

 

-THEMOONLIGHTREVERIE

 

Photo by Pete Bellis on Unsplash

Paralysed !

Certain days and certain nights,

more gruelling for the heart,

than others.

this unnerving void,

the excruciating pain,

just like, a knife twisted in the gut

the depth of which,

becoming inconceivable, to decipher.

Words failing, to fill the emptiness,

The feeling of numbness,

taking over the sensations in the body.

Paralysed in the midst of an abyss,

the soul drowning,

in the darkness of a closed box,

containing the broken pieces of,

all the hopes and dreams,

which once were pretext of,

a lively existence,

that, now are reduced to,

mere memories, that ain’t

soothes the pain no more,

rather dives the self into,

the land of nothingness.

 

-THEMOONLIGHTREVERIE

Photo by Roksolana Zasiadko on Unsplash